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Beyond Appearances: Embracing Diversity In Faith

The Daily Crucible by The Daily Crucible
September 24, 2023
in Opinion
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Beyond Appearances: Embracing Diversity In Faith

 

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 •Jimmy Odukoya 

 

I remember a top creative in Nigeria who wouldn’t stop talking about Charly Boy and what people were saying about him. He was clearly just following the crowd, echoing what everyone else was saying. I was getting irritated by his people-pleasing attitude, so I got harsh with him. I looked at him and said, “Charly Boy is about 25 years older than you, but he’s in much better shape. He’s also been married for almost 40 years, he fights for good governance… What do you have to say about yourself? You’re sitting here making excuses for why you don’t exercise, even for 30 minutes a day. You’d rather take pills and criticize Charly Boy for not being a role model. It’s ridiculous

 

 

By Ogo Maduewesi

I couldn’t help but sense that a divine revelation had been whispered to Pastor Taiwo and other spiritual leaders before his passing. It hinted at the future Senior Pastor of our beloved Fountain of Life Church, TFOLC, and it seemed to point directly at Pastor Jimmy. Questions buzzed in my mind. How would this transition sit with him? Despite previously shepherding Church 3:16 and the Cave Church, would this change challenge his acting career and other aspects of his life? I found myself pondering these questions, caught up in the anticipation, even though I was essentially taking imaginary aspirin for someone else’s imaginary headache.
On a breezy Sunday, September 17th, after church, my sister called to break the news. Overwhelmed with gratitude, I thanked God for what appeared to be divine providence. The baton was being passed, and I couldn’t have been happier. As my sister and I spoke, I remarked, “Can you see what God is doing? Look at Pastor Jerry, Pastor Suleiman…” She reminded me of another pastor I had inquired about, Pastor Irem. I told her, “The Lord is raising up the younger generation to take over…” I couldn’t help but see the bigger picture. It wasn’t just about one pastor; it was a changing of the guard, a new generation of spiritual leaders emerging, and I wholeheartedly embraced it. These pastors were unafraid to be different and to challenge the status quo. They were committed to following God and leading His people in ways relevant and impactful in today’s world.
Later that day, I got on Facebook and was taken aback by the Vanguard post and the comments about the church being an enterprise, a family business, and questioning why Pastor Jimmy Odukoya was chosen to take over. I realized that, because it’s my church and I’m comfortable with the decision, I might have overlooked the fact that social media is a platform for diverse opinions, including those about the church. Despite the many beautiful things people said and wrote about Pastor Taiwo, there was still public criticism of his son taking over as senior pastor. However, I found one comment by Chidi Okonta enlightening and affirming, where he mentioned that Pastor Kenneth Hagin’s son and Pastor Joel Osteen both took over after their fathers passed.
I knew that he would face challenges as the new leader of our church, but I also have faith in him. He is a passionate and charismatic pastor, and I am confident that he would lead our church into a new era of growth and prosperity.
I’m writing this today because the concern is no longer about the enterprise part of the church. Perhaps many people have seen the video where it was clearly stated that the Church Board of Trustees unanimously agreed to Pastor Jimmy Odukoya’s appointment, or maybe the news faded as usual on social media. My concern now is that his “Appearance” is being questioned, and I cannot let this pass by.
People often say that if you’re not being talked about negatively by someone somewhere, you’re probably not doing anything significant. You’re not relevant. I’ve come to agree with that.

A few years ago, a friend of mine was ranting about Pastor Jimmy also being a Nollywood star. She was uncomfortable with the fact that he kissed in movies. I tried to explain my own take on it, that it was all make-believe, but she insisted that he was setting a bad example.
This reminded me of how the public is always quick to judge people in the public eye. They focus on the negative or shortcomings and forget to consider the positives. They want people to live according to their terms, even if it means sacrificing their own individuality. I’ve been wondering, do any professions make people less or more human?
I asked my friend what example she was setting for the people who looked up to her, given that she was living with a married man. She said that her case was different because she didn’t stand on a pulpit to preach.
But I don’t think that matters. We all have a responsibility to be good role models, regardless of our profession. We should all try to live our lives with integrity and kindness.
Her responses and lines of thought about being a pastor and standing on the pulpit made me ask;
Am I expected to swallow everything my pastor says hook, line, and sinker? Does attending church services and listening to sermons preclude one from using their God-given intellect? Is it a sin to disagree with my pastor? Who’s responsibility really?

It was when she continued that I reminded her to look at her own life. This also reminded me of Charly Boy, who is known for his unique appearance. Young people often talk about him and he’s not showing good examples (laughs), I always ask them, “Are you looking at your father’s age-mate or someone older than your father as a role model?” That’s OK, but in what aspect exactly? To people around his age, I always point out that Charly Boy is in great shape, obviously from healthy living, been married for about 40 years, isn’t that something to emulate or learn from? All they see to criticize is his piercing and his appearance, but they miss the bigger picture.

 

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What is it with humans and our obsession with appearance? Why do we think we have the right to judge others based on their looks? Why do we think we can decide how others must look at certain events? This is a topic that I am deeply interested in exploring, and I am determined to do so at any length. What is the root cause of this behaviour? Orientation? Belief? Environmental factors? Africanness? Lack of exposure? The list goes on… What makes some of us think that we have the right to choose and decide for another how they must look? You’re saying that Pastor Jimmy shouldn’t wear his natural hair the way he chooses because he’s a pastor? Would you rather he live a life that’s not his own, that he’s not happy with, just to please you? Who are you?

I remember a top creative in Nigeria who wouldn’t stop talking about Charly Boy and what people were saying about him. He was clearly just following the crowd, echoing what everyone else was saying. I was getting irritated by his people-pleasing attitude, so I got harsh with him. I looked at him and said, “Charly Boy is about 25 years older than you, but he’s in much better shape. He’s also been married for almost 40 years, he fights for good governance… What do you have to say about yourself? You’re sitting here making excuses for why you don’t exercise, even for 30 minutes a day. You’d rather take pills and criticize Charly Boy for not being a role model. It’s ridiculous.”

It didn’t go over well, but I didn’t care. I’m not afraid to speak my mind, especially when someone is being hypocritical.
I didn’t plan to write more than a page, but I’m already on the third. I guess I’m getting carried away!
His “Appearance” is being questioned, and that’s something I can’t ignore. What is it with humans and our obsession with appearance? Why do we think we have the right to judge others based on their looks? Why do we think we can decide how others must look at certain events?
This is a topic that I am deeply interested in exploring, and I am determined to do so at any length. What is the root cause of this behaviour? Orientation? Belief? Environmental factors? Africanness? Lack of exposure? The list goes on…
What makes some of us think that we have the right to choose and decide for another how they must look?
You’re saying that Pastor Jimmy shouldn’t wear his natural hair the way he chooses because he’s a pastor? Would you rather he live a life that’s not his own, that he’s not happy with, just to please you? Who are you? People criticize Pastor Jerry Eze for his haircut, he wears ripped jeans, and he is criticized. I have nothing against constructive criticism, but there’s something wrong with trying to cyberbully in the name of criticism just for your selfish and hypocritical satisfaction. Shouldn’t that be a Christian trait? Are you running the race, or are you running yours through your posts?

A friend posted Pastor Jimmy on social media, and similarly, the same friend also commented on my post when Pastor Nomthi (Jimmy’s stepmother) passed, you wrote, “Pastor Taiwo should not think of marrying again. You win friend, Pastor Taiwo is no more, so no third wife. I however sometimes think about how we think up solutions for other’s life especially ones with such tragedies. How? Have you finished dealing with your own issues and those of your loved ones that you have time to sit and decide to the extent of voicing out what how you want another’s life to be?

I remember going back and forth with you on a certain US celebrity’s Instagram post where you commented, “her brows though”….and I commented, not in exact words, “Her brows are hers, her body, her style, her satisfaction, her peace…” You commented back, not in your exact words, “Ogo, leave this appearance thing; those brows don’t look good. And I am like, “Like how? “Is it your brows?” it’s okay if you don’t like it, but insisting that she should find a better makeup artist is really baffling. Who are you to insist I change what I want for myself? She likes her brows as they are; she sees them, and she loves them. But you don’t like it, and it doesn’t sit well with you that she loves something on herself as she wants it. Who is confused here? Do you, want another’s appearance preference to be exactly on your terms? What are we doing with God’s creativity? Who says we must all look the same and be the same? Why did He create some of us white, dark-skinned, tall, short, big, small, some with full hair, and others like us, having our hair on our prayer list? Why is the word style, choice, preference, and all in the dictionary? Where did the Word say it? Did the Bible say pastors are not human? What do we actually want? The demi-gods like pastors we grew up knowing? Why does their human nature have to stop because they are pastoring adults?

People come and go every day, and there will definitely be people (the people pleasers) who do not want to be told or hear that their pastor’s appearance is not godly or up to Christian standards. There are people who are genuinely not pleased with it because of their Christian orientation, like most of us used to be including me till we started questioning and open-mindedly understanding…
There are others who are indifferent, and all these sets of people are perfectly okay. We cannot agree always, and that’s very okay. We are human and we will all die human. And we can only live as humans…smiles…

Remember, irrespective of how you try to justify this, the responsibility for your actions, decisions, choices, and preferences is yours.

•Ogo Maduewesi is a Digital Creator & Founder, Outer Shell Africa Communications 

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